If I’d Known Page 8

  Joey turns to me, his eyes lit with excitement. "Ready?" He offers me his hand, eager to get lost in the crowd.

  I laugh. "Yes." Taking his outstretched hand, I let him navigate us toward the stage.

  I glance over my shoulder to make sure Nina, Lincoln and Tori are behind us.

  "Go!" Nina yells after me, still by the door.

  When I realize they aren't following, I pull Joey back toward them.

  "We'll find you after we go to the bar."

  "Will you hold my jacket then?" I ask her, already feeling too warm. Shrugging out of it, I toss it to Nina before they disappear in the opposite direction.

  Joey clasps my hand again, and within a few feet, we're swallowed up by the crowd of jumping, swaying and grinding bodies.

  When we're completely immersed somewhere in the middle of the madness, he turns to me and places his hands on my hips, drawing me to him. "We'll get a drink in a little while. I've needed this all night."

  I drape my hands over his shoulders and lose myself to the bass, rolling with the wave of intoxication that has finally taken over. With his hands gripping my hips, Joey guides our bodies until they're moving in unison. He's really good at this. Maybe too good because I'm so overwhelmed by the feel of him against me that everyone else disappears. His hands glide from my hips to the small of my back, pressing me firmly against him. If we were any closer, we'd dissolve into each other.

  I've never wanted a guy this badly before. Then again, a guy's never made me feel like this before. My body responds to his slightest touch. My pulse quickens every time his voice rumbles low in my ear. I'm held captive by him--willingly. I could seep into his skin and lose myself.

  Joey dips his head down and slides his mouth along my neck. I draw in a quick breath. When he reaches my lips, he breathes against them, continuing to tease and torment me. I close my eyes, needing to taste him, but he refuses to kiss me. I exhale slowly, unraveling.

  A few songs later, a tap on the shoulder wakes me from my Joey-induced haze. Tori is standing next to us with Lincoln and Nina dancing behind her. We separate to include them. Nina hands me a bottle of water with a knowing wink, and I could kiss her. My mouth is so dry, it's like I've swallowed sand.

  Every so often Joey brushes his hand against mine, playfully interlacing our fingers. I know he's trying not to give Tori a reason to throw her drink on him. But it's too hard for us to resist. We're overcome with a compulsion to touch. Within a song, he surrenders to the pull, moving in close behind me. I wrap my arms around his neck, and he trails his hand down my side. Our bodies ease together in a fluid, singular motion.

  "I think I need a drink," Joey murmurs in my ear before tasting the sweat on my neck.

  I squeeze his hands on my hips. "Yeah, me too." I look to Tori and Nina. "Bar?"

  They nod and we cut through the crowd to the other end of the open space.

  Just when the dancers start to thin out, we run into a wall of people waiting to order drinks at the glowing square bar.

  "There you are!" I look back to see a hand on Joey's shoulder. "I thought I told you to stay downstairs when you got here and I'd come give you your keys."

  I turn to find Parker Harrison standing before us.

  Parker and Joey may look alike in many ways, but while Joey's disheveled and sexy, Parker's polished and powerful. Joey's hair is displaced from raking his fingers through it, and Parker's is trimmed and neatly parted to the side. Joey's boyishly charming in an untucked button-down while Parker's jaw-droppingly kempt in a sports jacket. He looks ... important.

  I find myself captivated by eyes the same shade of electric blue as the boy I've been grinding against for the past hour. But I don't expect the betrayal I see reflected back in them. Whatever lecture he was about to give his brother about being here is lost.

  "Lana? What are you doing here?"

  "Hi, Parker." My stomach twists when his focus darts from Joey to me in confusion.

  "You know each other?" Joey asks.

  "Yeah," Parker replies, sounding distant as he pins me with a questioning stare.

  I don't say anything. There isn't anything to say. But I don't look away either, even though I should.

  "Lana's here with me tonight."

  I can feel the weight of Joey's arm around my shoulder, claiming me.

  Parker tears his attention away from me and gives his brother a pitying look. Then he laughs this amused, almost maniacal laugh. "Are you sure about that?"

  "Hey, Parker." Nina steps between us, stopping directly in front of him, her chest brushing against his. "Buy me a drink?"

  Parker eases his hand along her waist and places a ghost of a kiss on her cheek. "Hey, gorgeous. Maybe later? I have to go take care of something."

  Nina visibly deflates but recovers quickly. "No problem."

  Lengthening her spine, she turns and walks briskly away. I almost shiver from the ice rolling off her.

  I step out from under Joey's territorial limb and follow after her. Tori comes up beside me and makes a pained face when I look at her.

  "I know, right?! What the hell was that about?" I huff.

  But Tori's expression doesn't change. Clearly she's not listening. She runs a knuckle under her eye, indicating I should do the same.

  I swipe my finger to remove the smeared makeup. "Better?"

  Tori shakes her head with a grimace, like it hurts her to see me like this. "You're a mess."

  I'm suddenly afraid to know what I look like. I glance down at the rivulets of sweat running down my chest, disappearing into my cleavage, forming dark blue wet marks under my boobs. Tori's right. I'm a disaster.

  "I'll be right back," I tell her, needing to disappear immediately.

  She nods, hurrying me past her.

  "Lana!" Joey calls after me.

  "Relax. She's just going to the bathroom," I hear Tori tell him. "You can live without her for ten minutes."

  I spot flashing neon lights in the left corner, animating a girl dancing. There's one of a guy fist-pumping directly across from it. They have to be the bathrooms.

  I swipe my fingers under my eyes again and keep my head down, not wanting anyone to see the mascara melting down my face.

  An arm wraps around my waist and I'm swept into the darkness under the stairs.

  "Why are you here with my brother?"

  "Holy shit, Parker!" I exclaim breathlessly, lowering the elbow that was inches from smashing his nose.

  "Tell me," he demands impatiently, remaining way too close. I attempt to take a step back, but his arm tightens around my waist. "You've refused to go out with me every time I've asked. My brother's home for a day and you're here with him?"

  "Really?" I huff, pushing at his chest to separate us.

  Parker releases me and gestures impatiently when I don't continue.

  "Lincoln asked Tori to a party tonight. And it turns out, Lincoln and Joey are friends, which I'm sure you know. We're all here together. But it's not like you have any claim. You know that."

  "Why do you have to be so difficult?"

  Parker takes a step toward me, and I mimic it with a step back.

  "You know why." It's a conversation we've had too many times over the past year, and my answer's not going to change.

  "I don't have to see her again. You know what it's like with her. We're not together," he pleads. "We use each other. That's it."

  "And that makes it better? She's one of my best friends. You became untouchable to me the moment you touched her. You know my rule."

  I know what the two of them have doesn't mean anything. Nina pretty much repeats the same thing Parker just said. But they still get together, no matter how toxic whatever they have is. Respect and Confidence--like fire and an accelerant, their curses are a dangerous combination. They're constantly tearing each other apart--when they're not ... well, tearing each other apart.

  He growls in frustration. "Don't start anything with my brother." His words have an underlying threat to them.


  "What?! You don't have a say in that either!"

  "Lana, don't ... " Before he can finish whatever asinine thing he's about to say, I clench my teeth to keep from screaming and stalk past him. "Lana!"

  "Stay away from me, Parker!" I yell over my shoulder, hurriedly squeezing by people to increase the distance between us. My shoulder collides with a body.

  "Lana?"

  I slowly look up to find a guy with wavy brown hair and big dark eyes looking down at me. I scan the mold of the navy T-Shirt over his sculpted chest and the way his snug jeans fit perfectly. He's hot. Then I meet his eyes again and realize who he is. Holy shit.

  "Mr. Garner?"

  I instantly want to die. I just thought my guidance counselor was hot. But, in my defense, he looks way different without the glasses and tie. Way different.

  "Isaac," he corrects quickly, looking around like we might get caught doing something wrong. "What are you doing here?" Before I can answer, he says, "Forget it. Where's Tori?"

  I tip my head toward the line at the bar. He looks in her direction and nods, even though she's hidden within the crowd.

  "I can't believe you're here," he says, shaking his head. "Actually, if any of my students could get into this place, it'd be you and Tori. I swear it'll be a miracle if you two graduate in one piece."

  I often think the same thing. "Wasn't expecting to see you either."

  "You probably don't know, but I grew up in Oaklawn. I went to school with a lot of people here."

  "How old are you?" I ask automatically.

  I always thought he was old, like thirty or something. Maybe it's the tie ... or seeing him sitting behind a desk, surrounded by inspirational quotes. But tonight, dressed like a normal guy, he doesn't look much older than ... Parker.

  "Old enough to know I shouldn't be caught drinking with you," he replies. "I didn't see you tonight. And you didn't see me."

  "I don't even know who you are," I say, which isn't far from the truth.

  Isaac laughs. Even thinking his first name feels wrong. "Be good, Lana. Don't get into trouble." Then he walks off.

  Talk about weird. This night cannot get any more twisted. And just as I think it, I wish I hadn't. The last thing I want to do is tempt Fate. We don't have a good history.

  "Hey! There you are! I thought I'd lost you. Wait. Where are the rest of your friends? Are you lost? Do you need me to help you find them?"

  I remain still, staring up at the willowy girl with bright pink hair in a turquoise bandeau and matching sequined miniskirt.

  "It's Allie!"

  "Umm, yeah. I remember." Like there's any way I could possibly forget. "They're in line at the bar. I have to use the bathroom."

  "Me too!" she exclaims. "I found this super-secret bathroom upstairs that doesn't have a line. Wanna come?!"

  I eye the football field length line waiting to get in the girls' bathroom. "Sure."

  Allie takes my hand and leads me up the stairs to the mezzanine level. Looking down from here, I can see how big this place truly is. It's crazy-huge. The space is lined with black curtains, making it feel more private and ... sinister. I watch a girl in a metallic dress disappear into the dark with a bottle and glasses on her tray. It takes a moment for my eyes to adjust before I see the groups of people on lush couches concealed within the shadows. I can only imagine what they're doing back there.

  "So there's this office or something hidden up here with a bathroom in it. Another girl showed me earlier," Allie tells me.

  She pulls back a section of the heavy curtain next to a black door, casting light into the dark space. I quickly duck through the opening and she follows, concealing us behind the fabric wall.

  Light shines through a window-lined office where four girls wait to use the bathroom. When we enter, the first thing I notice is an oversized ornate mirror propped on a metal desk. A girl's leaning in close to it, lining her eyes. When I approach it, I immediately cringe at my reflection. No wonder Joey hasn't kissed me.

  I slide my headband off and let my hair down, shaking out the sweat-soaked strands. I rake my fingers through the length that extends to my lower back before sweeping it up into a large twisted bun and securing it on top of my head, sliding the crystal headband back in place. That's a little better.

  "Is your hair white?" Allie asks.

  I turn with a start, unaware she was hovering.

  "It's blond. It's just really light."

  She's not the first to mistake my hair for being white. Although it's usually little kids I'm correcting.

  "You should totally color it white," she says to my reflection, stepping closer to the mirror without blinking her eyes. "You would look like a frost princess. But you really do look like a princess." She reaches out to touch me, the reflected me, running a finger along my headband. "It's so sparkly."

  "Uh, thanks. My mother gave it to me." I watch her curiously. She's definitely ... unique.

  Allie spins around to face me, the real me, and throws her arms around my neck. "You're so beautiful," she says, hugging me tight. She steps back, holding me at arm's length, and just stares at me like she's trying to decide if I'm real. "I'm so high."

  I nod. Really? I mean, the wide, unblinking eyes pretty much gave that away. And for the first time, I recognize I'm feeling pretty floaty myself--but definitely not lost in the stratosphere like Allie.

  "You gotta go?" a thin brunette in boy shorts and a bikini top asks, motioning toward the bathroom that just opened up.

  "I do," I answer. And I also need the sink to clean off the black streaks running down my face. I look like I've been crying mud.

  I ease out of Allie's grip and enter the bathroom.

  When I come back out, Allie's still there. I'm not sure why. Maybe she thinks we're friends now. Except ... we're not.

  I inspect the sweat marks on my top in the mirror. Pulling the fabric away from my skin, I flap it gently, hoping it'll dry.

  "Want to go outside?" Allie asks. "It's so hot in here." She plops down on the desk, like she's too weak to stand. "I need some air."

  She doesn't look so good. I'm worried she may pass out, and there's no way I can hold her up.

  "Where can we go?"

  "This way," she says, crisscrossing her long legs as she weaves toward the door. "Why am I so hot? This is so not good, my princess."

  "It's okay," I assure her, taking her by the elbow to steer her through the curtain so that she doesn't grab on to it and pull it down. "Which way?"

  "That way." Allie points right.

  I direct us through the black door, entering a stairwell.

  "That way again." Her finger indicates a blue door with Exit lit above it.

  I push through and find a small group of people smoking on a fire escape spanning the alley between two buildings.

  Allie stumbles out of my grasp and trots down a few feet before collapsing on a grated metal step. "Omigod. My skin needed this so bad." She flops her arms over the railing in blissful relief.

  "Water?" some guy asks, offering her a bottle.

  "You are so super sweet," she says, looking up at him with her big blue eyes and thousand-watt smile.

  I grab the bottle from him first to make sure it's sealed before letting her have it.

  When she dumps half of it in her mouth, she releases an obnoxiously loud moan. "Best. Water. Ever."

  "Glad I could make you happy," the guy says with a creepy, predator smile.

  I turn to him, knowing he's lingering because he thinks he has a chance with her. "Get lost."

  He scowls and goes back into the building. That's when I notice the black boots on the steps next to my head. And, of course, I find Vic, the master scowler, doing exactly that down at me.

  I let out a disgusted breath and focus on Allie, pointedly ignoring him. "How are you feeling?"

  "I'm so happy," she responds, beaming. "Here, have some." She hands me the bottle of water before taking ahold of the railing to pull herself up.

&nb
sp; I easily finish it and abandon the empty bottle on the step. "Thanks."

  Allie stares at me with that same doe-eyed expression she wore in the truck. "You could be a fairy, you know. You have the biggest black eyes."

  "They're brown."

  "A little, tiny nose, kissed with stardust."

  "Or freckles."

  "And super-pointy cheekbones. Do you have pointy ears too?"

  She tips her head to look, like she expects they might be.

  "I don't."

  "All you need are wings and you'd be my fairy princess." She places her palms on my cheeks and speaks in a high-pitched voice, "I wish I could shrink you and put you in my pocket."

  I have no idea what she's talking about. She's delusional. I need to get her back to her boyfriend.

  "Where's Seth? Let's go find him. I'm sure my friends are wondering where I am too." Or at least I hope they are.

  "You do have wings! They're just hiding!" Allie declares when I turn to walk toward the door. She traces a finger along my right shoulder blade. "You are my fairy princess!"

  "Yup, you're right," I say with a sigh.

  When I glance at her over my shoulder, I realize Vic is gone--which is a good and bad thing. Good because I can't stand to be within two feet of him. Bad because now I have no idea where he is again, and I still don't trust him not to do something stupid.

  I reach for the door at the same time it pushes open. A girl steps out and I slide by her.

  "Allie!" I hear her screech in excitement right before the door clicks shut behind me.

  I groan into the empty stairwell, knowing Allie's no longer following me. I'd much rather be drinking and dancing with my friends, but I can't leave her. She's a disaster. I have to help her find Seth. I'm blaming the drugs for my uncharacteristic kindness.

  I set my hand on the release bar. As the door cracks open, I'm forcefully yanked from behind and slammed against the wall. Pain floods my head when it collides with the concrete. I blink to clear the spots from my eyes, disoriented. Something hard pokes my ribs and a forearm presses against my chest, pinning me. I pull at the arm, then grunt when the object jabs into me. It's a gun.

  How many guns does he have? Did he get this back from Nina? Why am I thinking about this right now?

  "You're not going to say anything about what happened tonight," Vic demands, his rank breath invading my senses.

  I stab him a thousand times with my glare. When I refuse to answer, he thrusts his weight against me, crushing my chest. I grit my teeth in pain.